The coping methods that we search for to buffer the bumps in the road of our everyday journey need to give us some sense of peace, or serenity. Some of our coping mechanisms work very well, some are very unproductive. How do we know if our coping method is working? Ask yourself if the end result is strengthening you somehow, it may have covered the pain briefly, but maybe it has created an addictive pattern that is tearing you down instead of granting you more peace, strength, or serenity. For example, drug or alcohol addictions,or any other addictions are examples of unproductive coping techniques. Sometimes the ways in which we have found to cope has worked for years but as our lives transition, we have to also transition the ways in which we cope. Is the way you cope still bringing you peace of mind, peace of heart, or serenity in a way that strengthens and empowers who you are? It is something we are best to keep in constant review.

This morning my departure was distracted by two little baby robins , their wobbly heads stretching and bodies following to the side of the stick- weave fortress. Even though I wanted to be on my way , I could not help but notice one precocious baby started bobbing his body almost in a” here I go, ready or not” fashion. I had a mother’s reaction, “no, don’t jump yet-you are not , ready!” Down he went, crazy out of control, right into the side of my neighbor’s house. My neighbor and I went looking for this little escapee, found him bewildered in a bush of ivy. My first instinct was to want to put him back in his nest, but it was too late, he had been released into a crash course of what the world had to offer him, one moment you are in total care of your mom, then suddenly , poof, you’re a robin!
I am sure this one will have a tough road to hoe, at least for the first few days, but now- he is on his own.
There are times when we are in an abusive situation, a crisis will occur and we
jump out of the nest blindly. We know we can not accept what just happened, but we are not able to wrap our minds around all of the new responsibilities that are thrown at us especially, when there are children involved. That is why education is so important and yes, if you are at risk, you need to leave, get out, find safety for you and your children. The reality is: you must plan what you are going to do to remain safe. This part is so difficult when you vacillate in your mind between what you thought you had, the person you thought he/she could be to you , and the reality of who he or she really is. Ready or not , always know there are support services out there to help you, it is important to use these services and listen to what people are educating you to do. otherwise you may be left in the lurch and further traumatized by what may come next. People who abuse you , will most likely continue to do it. Things do not grow better without some willingness to change and intense therapy. Things will almost never change on their own in an abusive situation.
Carefully plan what you have to do to be safe so that you and your children are at less risk.

It’s transition time. For anyone out there who actually does read my blog , I am sorry I have been temporarily out of commission. I have had some great things happening and some not so great. My brilliant son, Bret and his beautiful partner, Jaime have revamped my website for me-I am hoping that it makes navigating around the site more pleasant. Please let me know what you think!! THANK YOU BRET AND JAIME! I love it! So, it has taken me awhile to get back on here and make an entry , so busy! I have been in a transitional state, I am coming around again. The fact is there are many people out there who are still lost and I happen to think that I can be of help to them so that they may be found again as well!!

I have often been told :” ….you seem to know exactly what I am feeling!” That is because I have been through many things, to many places and one thing I know above all else is that I never want to stay lost again!! I hope to assist anyone who may still feel lost!! Isn’t that why we experience everything that we do? We can show someone else the way!

I have been going through a dry spell, frankly as much of a release that it is for me to write, (whether to draw the robots or just get my ideas out from their hiding places); my thoughts have been frozen! I think it is that we seem to be on winter’s edge all year. It is very cold , again and it is almost March, and instead of sensing that we are on the edge of spring , here I am sensing that we are on the edge of winter again! People are tempted from time to time to stay frozen , stagnant and not look to move toward progress. The trick is to work hard not to allow those frozen dispositions to cause us to freeze our dreams and our goals , despite “how we feel”, we choose to do things that will help us move forward!! So, yes I am preaching to the choir today!!